People date and get into relationships with different intentions and expectations. While some start dating and nurture the relationship so that it ends in marriage, others only want to have a partner to hang out with and no serious commitment.
It is critical for each partner to be forthright about their intentions of dating from the onset so that the other person can be well-informed. This is especially crucial if your partner shows indicators of wanting the relationship to end in marriage, but you have no intention of settling down any time soon or with them. However, it is critical not to rush to decide getting married, and you should be cautious if your date is pushing you to marry them, yet you feel you are not ready.
So, what are some of the crucial considerations when dating with the intention of marrying?
The Non-Negotiable Things
You must identify the things that you consider non-negotiable in your relationship and agree on them. It could be things about faith, financial contribution, and others. You may, for example, have a stand that you cannot date an alcoholic. Stating this upfront will set things straight, so if your partner does not accept your non-negotiable things, they can clearly move on.
The Place of Both Families
While dating with the intention of marrying, you need to identify how much space you will allow your families to occupy in your relationship. You may agree not to involve your family in the early days since being introduced to the entire family when you have just started dating may pile unnecessary pressure on a partner.
As you progress with your relationship and get to know each other better, you may meet each other’s family. However, if you feel that you are not yet ready to meet their family, but your partner keeps pushing you, it could be a red flag that they want to rush things. Having an honest conversation about each other’s expectations would be better to avoid any misunderstandings.
What if your partner has no intention of taking the relationship to the next level, but they do not come out clearly? It can be so disappointing and a waste of time when you finally learn this. The best thing is that you can be on the lookout as you date for tell-tale signs on whether they intend to settle down with you in the future. You can also research such signs or consult experts in relationships. You can also discover this info here so you are never surprised after having invested so much in a relationship only for it not to end in marriage.
The Timelines
Though you and your partner need to date for some time before considering settling down together, you need to have some timelines within which to evaluate things or take the next steps. If, for instance, you are not decided on marriage, unlike your partner and they are ready to give you time to make up your mind, you can agree to a timeline, say six months. After that time, you can evaluate your relationship, and if you are still undecided, you can both agree to move on. During dating, you may also set timelines within which you will move in together or have your relationship formalized. The essence of setting deadlines is to avoid dating for years on end or having no definite goals to work towards.
You and your partner need to be honest about your marriage goals, and the journey from dating to marriage will be easier and less stressful. It will also prevent wasting each other’s time if one is not for marriage. Besides, you can agree on how and when to involve your families in your relationship and at what period you should settle or consider parting ways if there are no shared goals and dreams.
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